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First Impression: With over 1,400 dating apps and websites, this book is worth the time to digest some cautionary tales about the pitfalls of dating.

Not all dating app predators will stop at money or a place to crash. Some may want to steal your identity. Others may cut out your body organs to sell on the black market. They’re psychopaths who wish to use, assault, and rape you. Or even enjoy stealing your life.

Karen Marie Shelton (2023)
How To Avoid Murder While Using Dating Apps book cover

Online dating, whether through the web or through an app, has been around for a while now and is here to stay. The title isn’t reduced to the common sites we think of such as Tinder and Harmony. It includes social media sites too such as Facebook and Snapchat.

Expressing deep gratitude to Karen Marie Shelton for a copy of this book in return for an honest review, I will now offer my thoughts.

There are over 1,400 dating apps and websites as of June 2023.

Karen Marie Shelton, (2023)

So, What’s it About?

We probably all know someone that has an online dating profile. We’ve probably heard someone cite using these apps because they are unable to find a nice guy/lass in their area. They reason that they are too busy to go out to find someone, or that they don’t know where to look. Some simply just want to take their time getting to know someone from a distance before meeting their connection in person. Heck, we might even know the odd couple here and there that will owe their meeting to a chance swiping left on an app, and that it was the best decision of their lives. Karen Marie Shelton’s How to Avoid Murder While Using Dating Apps is not interested in the success stories.

She doesn’t write about the sickeningly sweet couple that are made for each other. Instead, Shelton shares 8 cautionary tales where dating apps have created perpetrators and victims of the users. Following these experiences paints a damning picture of meeting your match. Now, no one is saying steer clear of the apps. Shelton hopes that once you read what she has to convey and take note of the associated advice, dating app users will be at a decreased risk of danger because they are more aware of the sirens that beckon them to run for the hills and don’t look back.

Writing Technique

Beginning with a repetitive introduction, I found myself stuck in a loop of reading backwards, reading forwards, and backwards, and forwards. Were my eyes deceiving me? No, Shelton uses this technique to tweak each repetition ever so slightly, but it has the effect of hitting home and sitting at the forefront of your mind as you read on. Shelton is on a mission with a story, or eight to tell, and she is going to make sure you pay attention. Younger, or older, you never know, it could save your life!

The Lenz Case

Starting with the Lenz case that was heard in January 2023, Shelton demonstrates just how recently these predators have been preying on their victims. And how young! The story of the 17-year-old predator is not written in a way to shock you, in fact all the stories are written objectively with no overt judgment, simply displaying the facts as they were discovered. The short book makes for fascinating reading. The presentation is simple and devoid of embellishments such as personal opinions (for the most part). With the facts presented in a logical fashion, it will be hard to fathom some of the sentences that were awarded to the perpetrators of violence.

Who is the Book For?

Fans of Netflix’s The Tinder Swindler will appreciate this book. With hindsight, it’s easy to look back and wonder how people got themselves into these situations, but with the case of Bushby and Katie, and LaBarre and her many husbands we saw relationships that had been carefully constructed over time. Other fans will include those with an inclination toward true crime. The real readers of this book, however, should be anyone that’s looking to date someone not well known to them, their family, or their wider community. To be fair, whilst the apps provided a vehicle for secrecy, even traditional dating has its pitfalls. The aforementioned LaBarre case started prior to the availability of the internet and still reaped dire consequences for the victims. Overall, this is an easy read in the sense that it doesn’t use complex language and writing devices. It keeps to its purpose of providing warnings and advice for the dating community whether they be 17 or 70.

So again, let me make it clear, no one is saying that dating apps are awful. They can be a great resource for finding a meaningful connection. Just ensure you are putting safety measures in place. I leave you with a key fact to dwell on…

An analysis of data from 2017 to 2020 had 1,968 acquaintance sexual assaults, with 14 percent occurring from a dating app first found in-person meeting. One-third of the victims were strangled and had more injuries than other sexual assault victims.

Karen Marie Shelton (2023)

Quick Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ / R

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